A messy attempt at writing, I will gather my ideas from this blog into the story below. I’m working on it, it’s quite unordered at present, all over the place. Just the beginning of an attempt to write. I thought entanglement a suitable title as we all live in a tangle and it’s an interest of mine.
Looking where I normally look at the coffee shop in the morning I see a hobbling woman struggling along all hunched over, I try to imagine the events of her life, the events that have made her the woman that she is today. I believe there was no event in her life that made her move about as awkwardly as she now does, quite a typical walk for an elderly Singaporean, they so often hobble. After several attempts under the webpage ‘yelp’ on this site I make a new attempt at a story then, a book, I was thinking something more humanistic this time, I’ll get back to aliens soon enough, no she will probably interact with them, the other world.
She is thinking of her 22nd birthday, it is something she frequently recalls. Her husband took her dancing that evening, she never thought she could dance, afterwards it became a habit for them, to dance. Today she struggles to move, something she once did very gracefully, elegantly, when dancing. She was married at 19 to a man she deeply loved, pregnant with the first of their five children at the time of their marriage, she had two children before the birthday she often remembers. Her husband arranged a babysitter for that evening, his mother. That birthday celebration, dancing, was the pinnacle of her life she thought. To dance. She still feels him dancing with her, her husband is still with her despite dying. The religion that she observes is adamant that there is no such thing as death, something she now believes fervently. She always sees her husband and talks with him since his death, it’s as though he still exists. He died of cancer 7 years ago, he physically left her but has remained spiritually.
Just now as I watch her hobbling she drops a newspaper that she was carrying, and kneeling down to pick it up she said thank you to the spirit of her deceased husband, his spirit helped her. A gaunt and very old man. Yesterday she attended her sisters funeral but knows through these experiences that her sister still exists, also because this dead sister told her that she had only gone to the Buddha, gone to the afterlife. Her sister had told her this after she had passed away. Some might think she dreamt of her sister but for this hobbling woman dreams have a reality. In fact for her what she thinks feels real. In an uncommon way her thoughts have taken on a kind of reality, and so when she thinks of her husband he is real to her. When she asks somebody if they heard what her dead husband just said the answer is always no. Many humans experience the dead, there are so many stories of this phenomenon, but we are often too locked into the human perception of this world to perceive the other world, it exists if you close your eyes and feel. She has always perceived this otherness, and loved to dance.
Her name is Agnes. Agnes once visited the place of her birth, the village, and was overcome by the brightest light she had ever experienced. Everyone had told her she had fallen asleep whilst sitting in a living room where she had grown up. She had always taken this experience for an extremely vivid dream, the dream had only lasted a short while. During this dream, in the light, a figure had appeared, it was a very comforting person she thought, somehow this dream stimulated a very blissful emotion in her. Shortly after this experience she begun to see figures that other people told her weren’t there but she was certain they were, and her memory became so perfect that all the people she knew began using her as an encyclopedia, as the source of facts for what had happened. Her husbands spirit didn’t surprise her when he appeared, some believed Agnes when she spoke of his visits.
While Agnes was at her home she also saw Bernard hiding in the courtyard, he appeared as a child, was it her memory now playing tricks on her she thought. As children they used to often play here together, she always felt very good about Bernard, after all he was the best man at her wedding. Bernard had become a university professor, after that they might occasionally talk about her experiences, she thought if Bernard were still alive and here he would be most interested in her vivid dream just now. During childhood Bernard had always been struck by her empathy, and her stories of people. She seemed to know things about everyone she met or saw. Indeed Agnes inspired in him a fascination in the world which eventually led to him wanting to understand existence in a concrete way. So he became a scientist.
When he was a scientist he often enquired about her dreams and the events in her life, always as a friend however the motivation was pointed for Bernard. He always thought to let her be and not to over question her experiences but to leave them as they were. He feared she could lose her gifts if too many human concepts were imposed on her. Others were in the habit of calling Bernard Bernie, she hated that as she thought Bernard a much nicer name than the abbreviated Bernie. During his studies Bernard discovered Entanglement theory which immediately appealed to him. It somehow explained Agnes. It’s notion of other modes of communication between matter suggested to him that Agnes was actually operating in this other scientifically perceived mode of communication. Indeed he thought Agnes’s emotional connection with the world was real, as real as atoms and matter.
Bernard first started studying at university in Singapore, NUS. It felt a special place each day he went there, after studying he would go to a local haunt for a drink. He believed that the haunt was the true university often meeting lecturers there and discussing the subjects he was learning. One such occasion had a profound impact on Bernard, a lecturer who was absorbed by entanglement theory talked with him about it and he too became absorbed by Entanglement. At NUS with the very same lecturer he first learnt of Entanglement’s double split experiment, an experiment he would do in laboratory type conditions. Absorbed he became in the theory. The experiment suggested that particles can communicate faster than the speed of light or any possible mode of data transfer known to man. That if you change the polarity of one particle another changes simultaneously if the particles were created in the same event. So Bernard thought Agnes was interacting with this other mode of communication.
Agnes was often taken by light similar to that day when she saw Bernard in the living room, but never so strongly. The light mostly would be accompanied by faint sound, like it was trying to say something. She would often try to reply but nothing would ever happen to confirm to her that it was verbal communication. But somehow these events would respond to her thoughts, for example when the light was too bright for her and she was shocked by the glow it would dim, sometimes. But when she saw Bernard it didn’t dim at all so intense was the experience, in a human way she might have claimed the light became brighter. The intensity of the experience wasn’t the light although the only way she could apprehend the experience was through the metaphor of light. Agnes could understand what Bernard said though, indeed he was a gateway for her comprehension.
Bernard had said it is here to help you. She didn’t know what was here? But as he said that to her the light seemed to acquire an identity. She had felt comforted at the beginning of this experience, when Bernard told her it was here to help, she thought the light then became her father. So my father has come to our old home too she thought. But she had previously interacted with her father in this way, he often appeared as he did in her youth, this was different. Her father had always comforted her in life too, this was different. And as she had begun to think of the light as a person her thoughts changed, not by her own instigation. The idea of comfort returned to her. At this point Bernard said it doesn’t use words to communicate but thoughts. People always think that they are the origin of their own thoughts. Bernard said we can communicate with it non verbally. He said thought is reality in this place, this dimension. He said when I think of trying to make you happy or think of a feeling you often respond, sometimes you appear happy when you think of it. Indeed just now she had an overwhelming feeling of contentment. Bernard said light is intelligent in other worlds, gas too, any matter. Light has particles he said but intelligence is non material. In some worlds there is only thought and it can become embodied but thought actually exists in another domain of the universe, independently, and matter can access thought as matter is too a part of the universe. Thought can be the crossover between these two aspects of the universe, physical and cerebral. In fact thought came first and conceived of matter, particles are the children of thought. We as humans exist in both domains as does light, colourful light. Bernard also studied a japanese scientist that had proven our thoughts have a material impact on water crystals. People are beginning to understand that thoughts have a real and tangible effect. Bernard was sitting preparing a lecture one evening when light began moving about him very unusually, with intention. Then it spoke. It told him through his language, or maybe his mind, ideas, that it had been quite a puzzle how to interact with this world, the material world, the world of his dimension. Then they had determined how to gather light particles for that purpose, to interact. The light told him they were from another dimension, not like him of the 3rd dimensions, the material world, but of another dimension, the thought world.
***note… I’m thinking of the light that Agnes experiences as alien life from another dimension interacting with her… along with her communications with the dead… both entities are from that other dimension. Emotional versus intellectual