A few science documents on the web that consider consciousness and existence. So I don’t lose them again I thought I should post them on my blog, My memory is quite bad so sometimes I can’t find them…
Happy lunar new year, the year of the rooster begins tomorrow… ‘Gōng Xǐ Fā Cái’ which means ‘respectful happiness become wealthy’ or ‘happy new year’ in Chinese. It’s a massive event here in Singapore, a few days of public holiday and a unique thing called ‘lo hei’ or ‘harvest fortune’ where together with the people you are celebrating with you toss food with chop sticks. The food elements representing various things including wealth of course.
I’ve been progressing so well that rather than this website my focus has been on my other two sites and trying to find work. Indeed I’m ready to work again. In many messages with a close friend about work he suggested that I sound like a colleague in my technical discussion with him. I do know IT very well having worked in senior positions for more than 15 years. Now I build and manage my own websites, one of which aspires to technology support, the most developed page on that is the one about Weebly. I copy the links below to my other 2 websites, 3 in all including this one… resumè
‘Home on my own, all alone’ – words from a Not Drowning Waving song. Well I’m not exactly that, my wife is asleep. Mother is in hospital for a foot infection the result of her diabetes. Hospitals remind me of coma. Previously mother needed a toe amputated for a similar complaint, I sincerely hope her foot survives. But it has been very peaceful this morning without her, and my wife also unwittingly bolted the door and her brother out before sleeping which was very bad, mother bolted us out recently too. Singaporeans are paranoid about people breaking in with all access but if burglars are already in they could un deadlock the door anyway. We certainly hope for mother’s speedy recovery and that she keeps her foot but just the same it’s an excellent song and quite a nice way to live. ‘Home on my own, all alone’. I think it goes on as ‘this town is tool loud to be yourself, too loud to understand’.
I felt I had to do a new post today because I previously did so many from here shortly after coma, from this place ‘the Whirling Dervish’. The Arab street area of Singapore is absolutely fantastic as always, to be here and alive is exciting. A man after my own heart was Rumi, a deep thinker and spiritualist. Whenever I think of whirling dervishes I always think of Rumi.
I’ve returned to a place I used to frequent on the Singapore river. I was reflecting on my last post on the train, I began to think spirituality a much more important ambition than working to make money, but we humans must pursue both given the world we’ve built and our inclinations. Perhaps one day we will ask each other not how much do you earn but questions like where have you been? And talk about reality, things like love and hope… I realise we talk of and write of such things but it seems to me our primary focus is money, perhaps we can buy love and hope… I hope I get better… How much?
Well I’m at my favourite place in Singapore again, the whirling dervish. It’s getting close to that time for me to look for a job again. Just thinking about it gets me excited. Companies like Apple and Google have great ideas, must be the people. Catching the train today everyone was on their devices. With technology and GPS smart phones can now know things about people. Technology is really helping me to resume life, if only this was all in place before my accident.
It’s great to return to Red Dot on the Singapore river and meet you today friend. I’m finally back after about 2 months, travelling to many places, the last of which was India and I thought of you constantly and our meetings in this place. I haven’t changed, a macchiato my friend? I’ll take a short black. Things around here are changing, still feels the same. I promise I won’t keep talking or should I say writing like before, people are getting bored of me, but it really feels like old times, perhaps my memory is improving.
Like a human in conversation I change my mind all the time and constantly add to these posts or change them, if you thought them at all of interest please check them, let’s continue the conversation, the last post ‘transcendence’ has changed dramatically since conception, even this very post has. Just to add a remark for coma experiencers, I still can’t move my right hand side very well or even write, thank god for computers. Difficulties showering and brushing my teeth. Every day I still work on my right foot and try to move the toes about, not very well, my walking remains terrible, but people I haven’t seen for a while tell me things are improving and looking better, we must keep trying and working at it. A macchiato my friend?
I hope everyone is having as good a day as me, I feel I’m tracking towards recovery after many setbacks. We must keep trying. By my experience there are so many setbacks in recovery from coma, it’s been almost three years now and at last I can see a glimmer of light, my memory is even improving I believe. Nothing specific but a general outline of the jobs I was previously employed to do. Perhaps more memories to come, maybe I’ll return to normal one fine day. Like today it will be magical.
ballet is the purist art, we all live in bodies, to move gracefully is beautiful, if you get a chance to witness grace take it, ballet… magic
people think my only interest in it is because I’m loosing control over my own body, our movement is so fundamental to do it elegantly was something humans would always pursue… Ballet
Humans always seem to be discussing money, and their work for it, never the magic of existence, well almost never it seems to me. Clearly they must cover life sometimes. I often overhear conversation going on around me doing my thing, nothing, well I guess I don’t have a job at present so I’m excused from the mundane. I use the German word again, geld, money. We must be close to evolution when we no longer need to focus on the mundane, das geld. Humans look like monkeys going about the world, little families with children, to be born into a place devoid of critical and soulful thought should be terrifying for us. Ballerinas aren’t monkeys though. A macchiato my friend?
All of a sudden I feel optimistic about life. I’m not usually hopeful. My wife is at work and we can exist. When I consider all things we are fortunate people. We can at last live how we choose, maybe we can move in the long run. Choice will be paramount but we all must choose. We can potentially live well enough. Life. That is what we’re all experiencing. Life.
I realize I have used the word before but stuff the coffee, let’s have a beer.
Stuff typically means things, but it’s also relevant to human beings, we are just stuff of the universe. I think we go on in a way when we die, we decompose and rot and perhaps they can obtain information about our existence, that we once lived. Don’t get me wrong I think people are mostly good inside, but life is transitory in this place, it may continue in other ways beyond material existence. And I promised to be uplifting, a latte my friend?
A day in Singapore and frustration seems to be resuming. We are all bothered by the humdrum of life, perhaps old habits are returning. I’m no different to anyone, just experienced a coma and slowly normalizing. And so the monotony of existence returns, it was only a short break from the mundane, it’s just been three years of recovery, so this is it then, normal life, I don’t know how you do it, excruciating at times.
Catching the MRT train today I couldn’t help thinking that humans are just like ants. We are very orderly like an ant farm. Good at following instructions and performing repetitive tasks. Why not? We are like ants in being alive, living and existing. Except for art and thought we are like them going through the hum drum of life. We look like ants all filing to get on board the train or shopping and stuff. I often wonder where the inspiration comes from, except music, literature etc, we merely follow orders. Why not focus more on the heights of humanity, I’ll try my best to do that. Perhaps we appear as ants to our alien friends, maybe thought is merely a byproduct of life and we live according to our invented rules, ants have no thought I suspect, just reaction to stimulus. Like an ant I must return to a previous habit, a macchiato my friend.