I accept now that I will never be able to work again. My memory and walking are too bad. No one would conceivably hire me. People on the train appear accepting of our lot, and financially focused. I wonder when they will see more in life and become frustrated with our systems and the crazy things we do that take us away from the magic of existence. Probably they all desire not to work but are so accepting of what human civilization impose on people. Back at last to the scene of the crime, a different place though in the same country, Ao Nang, Thailand. Less of the mundane here, less of the regiment, definitely preferable. My memory and walking are so bad, I struggle to even remember the last time I was here, having been to Thailand many times I find it hard to remember any of them. I can remember koh Samui and some places there like Chaweng and Lamai, I have been to many but can’t remember anything about my visits. Appalling really. Life has become very difficult indeed when you are constantly questioning and not remembering.
Clearly we humans are driven by concepts, like right versus wrong, right versus left, up versus down, and life versus death. These heights of binary logic will probably lead us to more wars, this is my land versus your land. They have certainly led to artificial intelligence, perhaps thought too will no longer be needed from us. Just maybe there is another reality to discover, those thoughts listed above are real for the physical world perhaps, a perspective. Truth is really quite personal. I’m back at the beauty garden coffee shop, for the first time in months, a macchiato my friend?
I’m becoming tired of the constant self monitoring, simply everything I consider along with ‘do you need to go to the toilet now?’ I always study my thoughts, are you normal yet Mathew? I hope life becomes normal again, just a flicker from the past, what is normal anyway? More than normality I hope for evolution.
Humans always seem to be discussing money, and their work for it, never the magic of existence, well almost never it seems to me. Clearly they must cover life sometimes. I often overhear conversation going on around me doing my thing, nothing, well I guess I don’t have a job at present so I’m excused from the mundane. I use the German word again, geld, money. We must be close to evolution when we no longer need to focus on the mundane, das geld. Humans look like monkeys going about the world, little families with children, to be born into a place devoid of critical and soulful thought should be terrifying for us. Ballerinas aren’t monkeys though. A macchiato my friend?